I Don't Want to Wake Up
by Sugar High Angel
Summary: Oneshot. Yuki. Just read if you're interested.


_Wow, are my stories angst this week or what? I'm not really sure why though…hmm… oh well, what can you do? So here's my first ever Fruits Basket fic! Yay! Well enjoy! Oh and any one who loves Akito, don't get me wrong, I think he's pretty cool in a cold sort of way, so don't think I hate him. –Sugar High Angel_

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket or any of its characters. So please don't try to sue me! I'm poor! All I have is my penny George, don't take him from me!**

A rat. A dirty, stinking, lying rat. No one could ever love the rat. The rat was a lonely creature by nature, no one likes rats. Except for him. He accepted me, and then betrayed me. I had mixed feelings towards him. I couldn't place my finger upon one and be certain that is what I felt towards him, but I knew he was in control of my life from day one.

Akito. He was beautiful, graceful and elegant. Don't get me wrong, I did not love him in that way. But I loved him all the same. At the same time though, I feared him. He could control me; tell me what to say and what to do without uttering a word. I was merely in too much awe to see through his lies.

I remember walking with him through the many gardens he owned, smiling when he praised me, and bowing my head in shame when he would tell me my wrongs. I had a sense of childhood awe of him. He was my idol. In a way, he was my first love, as I was Haru's. But then, it happened.

I was playing in the garden with some of my friends. We were having such fun, and I was so happy. But then, a girl, Kita, ran into me. Suddenly, everyone towered above me and I knew I had transformed. Shigure ran out and all the children were ushered into the house. Hatori erased their memories then and there. They could never remember me. The worst was when I learned Akito had told them to do it. It broke my heart.

It all went down hill from there. Suddenly Akito confined me to my room. I was allowed no visitors besides my family, him and the servants. I now lacked friends and freedom. To make matters worse, my older brother left me. I could feel his coldness as he walked away. I guess it was like waking from a dream, a dream where you only peace and were always happy. Then, someone hits you with icy water and wake to find yourself in the real world, where happiness is but a distant memory.

When I was fourteen, I felt the first pulls of rebellion. I went against Akito's wishes and snuck out to see Shigure, who lived somewhere else, when I got back, a servant was in my room waiting for me. He stood up and had me follow him to a room. He led me in, and then walked out. I heard a click and knew I was trapped. The room was large and empty. There were no windows and the door was nearly impossible to see. It was made to leave me go insane.

I don't know how long I was there, but horrible images flew into my head. My mother smiling coldly at me. My brother glaring at me with cold hate. My father, dead in his wrappings before he was cremated. I could think of nothing good, only the horrible times I had seen. Then, he came. He was 15 then, and still carried that languid grace and elegance.

"How could you disobey me?" he asked. "Do you think you can escape me?"

I'll never forget that look in his eyes, that smile of pure joy as he pulled out that whip. I remember that sharp slap of pain as the whip hit me. "Stop!" I cried, but he wouldn't listen, he just kept going. Then, he did an unspeakable thing. He was laughing at me. he laughed at my pain. Then he threw down the whip and took my face in his hands and kissed me.

I went into shock then and there. "I love you," he said, "you're so beautiful Yuki; you could have everything you ever wanted. I would give it to you, if you say you'll be mine and mine alone…" then he kissed me again, slamming his tongue into my mouth and sliding his hand into my clothes.

"NO!" I screamed. I threw him off me and ran. I didn't know where I was running, but somehow, I ended up outside of Shigure's house. Tears were falling down my cheeks in large drops. I felt so… dirty. I don't know how long I was standing there, but Shigure coincidently walked out and saw me. he took me inside and let me sleep in his room. I knew I could trust Shigure, but I could never tell him what had happened.

"Where is he Shigure?" I heard Hatori say at the front door.

"Who would 'he' be Hatori?" I heard Shigure reply calmly.

"You know very well who I mean. Akito said he tried to talk about school to Yuki, but he ran out. Now, tell me where he is." Hatori said a hint of anger in his voice. I heard him start walking down the hall where I was. I heard the door rolled open and closed my eyes while relaxing my face. I could feel Hatori staring at me.

"Hari, look at him. He was crying when I found him in front of my house. Leave him here with me for awhile, let him relax." Said Shigure in a low voice.

I heard Hatori sigh, and then he gave in. "Fine. I will tell Akito." I then heard his steps recede into the distance and eventually stop.

"Yuki, you can stay here. I wish you'd tell me what happened, but that's for you to decide. But just remember, I trust you." Shigure said. I then heard him walk away.

The next morning, I told him everything. Shigure said he understood and left for the main house and argued that I should stay with him. Akito was said to be angered by this and fought like an angry bear. But Shigure won.

So I should have been happy right? Wrong. I realized I could never be free of Akito's power. He controlled the Sohma's. I had to commit one last act of rebellion towards Akito.

It was when he demanded that I go to an all boy's school. He thought it an act of protection. I thought it was a trap. I defied Akito once more and went to a boys and girls school. It was there I made friends and somehow became "the prince".

When I met Tohru, it was probably the first time I really laughed again, really smiled again, really felt truly happy, really loved. That's right, I love Tohru. I love her, and she loves me. Once again, I am in my dream world, and I hope I never wake up.


End file.
